When was the last time you got really angry? Was your heart beating fast? Did you feel like you wanted to explode? Were you upset with another person, or just a situation in general? How did you react? More importantly, were you satisfied with your reaction to the circumstance a day later?
I’ve always been a pretty calm person for about 95% of the time. Prior to becoming a coach and running my own business, if you caught me at an angry moment (during that 5% of the time), it would’ve been best to move out of the way. I was a very black or white thinker and if someone did something I thought was unfair, manipulative, or wrong they would be cut off. I wasn’t vindictive or trying to get people back, in my mind I just decided that I didn’t want individuals like that around me.
Even though I’d tell others about why I didn’t agree or like what they were doing, I usually didn’t give them a chance to correct their actions. I was just leery of them moving forward. I didn’t believe that by eliminating people so quickly, I was in fact holding on to negative energy or thoughts about them. The reality is that you will have to release some people, jobs, ideas, and goals throughout your life. There is a way to let things go and move forward without taking the negative energy with you. Here are three ways to reflect and release negative energy!
1. Look at things from another point of view
When you’re angry, do you stop to consider other perspectives? What reasoning might someone have for not agreeing with you? Most people get so attached to their position, that they can’t see other valid points or concerns. Do you demean others or insult those who don’t think like you? The world of politics tends to operate this way, and it can be quite negative while creating stressful situations for those involved. Simply consider another point of view without emotional attachment.
2. Take some time away
If you’re fully immersed in a conflict, this can be very difficult. The goal is to stop yourself from rushing to a conclusion, judgment, or a counterproductive reaction that you can’t take back. It’s best to give yourself a day (or overnight) to think about something before making a decision that is emotionally charged. This is a very different scenario than an instance where you need to make a powerful decision on something in your business or career in order to move forward (those should usually be done swiftly). Remind yourself that the false sense of urgency leading you think, ‘I have to tell them this right now.’ is created in our minds (or the minds of other people).
3. Recognize that you can only control yourself
Most professionals find themselves trying to control thoughts and actions of other people, along with the overall course of events. You can do yourself a favor and stop! The only person you can control is YOU. No one can “make you angry” or make you do anything. You have a choice in creating everything in your life. With that understanding, mentally releasing negative people and situations that aren’t serving you can help create the business and career you want.
How might looking at things from another point of view assist in changing your thinking? Would taking some time away from a situation allow you to clear your mind, and not have hard feelings about the outcome? You can eliminate some stress by choosing to release negative energy and people. If you did that, what would you gain in your business or career?
P.S. If you liked this post, you might enjoy our FREE Vision of Success Session. Contact us today for your session!
Porschia Parker-Griffin
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